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@diviacaroline says therapy culture is accused of welcoming all emotions except…

2026-08-05 · 16:27 UTC ·@diviacaroline ·1 min read

Brief

@diviacaroline reframes the critique that therapy culture welcomes all emotions except shame, arguing the actual blind spot is meta-shame — shame about having shame. She amplifies kip (@sergeantsup), who says a conversation 'last year' revealed she'd suppressed shame behind a required veneer of confidence and is now beginning to acknowledge and tentatively share it.

Why it matters

@diviacaroline says therapy culture is accused of welcoming all emotions except shame, but argues the realer blind spot is 'meta-shame' — being ashamed of having shame.

Key details

  • Kip (@sergeantsup) recounts that 'last year' a boyfriend's line 'I don't feel ashamed to be ashamed' made her realize she'd been hiding shame, feeling pressure to appear confident/shameless to be likable, and she's now starting to notice and tentatively share that shame.
Source evidence

people have accused therapy culture of saying all emotions are functional and welcome except shame*

But I think somewhat “realer” therapy culture says all emotions are welcome except meta-shame

*which sure probably sometimes reflects how some people think of it

kip (@sergeantsup)

last year I was talking to my bf about shame. I was confused he was admitting having it. he reacted like ~"well I don't feel ashamed to be ashamed"

and I realized: oh! I feel that way!

I haven't been consciously identifying my shame because I've felt like it's not ok to have it. only since that conversation, I've started to look at it when it happens

I've noticed I have this long-running sense that I must be confident. like I'm good and likable if I'm shameless and I love myself. confident people can pull off anything, right?

but it's restrictive and inauthentic to force that upon myself. it is too hard to maintain confidence at all times

I'm def still uncomfortable sharing when I feel shame. but idk I'm playing with it

— https://nitter.net/sergeantsup/status/2084859913633993021#m